At the GP

This snippet of conversation took place between me and my GP - who I have been seeing for around 6 years - yesterday, when I went in for a pap smear.

GP: Let me just check your social history.

Me: Okay. 

GP: Are you married?

Me: No.

GP: Oh.

Me: I mean, de facto, I guess ...

GP: Children?

Me: No.

GP: Oh. Dog?

Me: No.

GP: Oh. Pause. I guess you have a lot of time to yourself then.

Me: Yes.

Pause.

GP: My son has two guinea pigs. They take a lot of work.

Me: Oh.

GP: I'll lock the door now and you can take your clothes off from the waist down when you're ready.

Me: Okay.

On the table, pants off ...

GP: You're a ... writer. Yes?

Me: Yes. I just did a show in the Melbourne Fringe Festival. Pause (desperate for some kind of validation). It won an award.

GP: Oh. That must be good, to get some recognition.

Me: Yes.

GP: Just put your feet together now and let your knees drop out to each side. I'll try and be gentle. (Gentle laugh).

End Scene